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| Day 1 of notice period begins today. After 2 months of unsuccessful desperate job hunting, I gave up looking for jobs, bcos the offers I got were nothing close to what I wanted to work in/with. This one, just came through a friend, and I knew the interview was really going to be disgusting, bcos they ask syntax etc. The first time, they called me 2 months back, I knew their interview pattern, and so didnt bother to reply. Then after repeated calls, I vaguely agreed to meet them, which I didnt bother to confirm.
I managed to abscond on the scheduled day of my interview. Later, bcos this was a friends friend, I apologized sending a mail. Then when he still said, the vacancy was open, I took it up seriously and prepared during the Aug 15th weekend. yes, I wrote every bit of commas, brackets, semi-colons, etc to mug-up the syntax huh .. And know what, at the interview I really goofed up at the beginning with the hello world pgm. hmm. I decided it was not my kind of judging a person, so I didnt co-operate for the rest of the interview.
A week later, I get the offer. Comparing what I do currently and what I want to do in future, this seems to be an intermediate step. So after much thought, I decided to accept the offer. Finally, I am moving a step positively towards what I want in life. | |
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| Ah. Just finished my morning chores in time to settle down to watch Kalathur Kannamma . I rarely watch movies, but want to watch Kamal Hasan's first movie ever! Only seen video clips like this one By the way, this link says the language is Hindi!! Great way to describe a Tamizh classic... Thank goodness, this link is better! - Mood:sleepy
 - Music:waiting for the lovely songs!
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| Nice retro music, lots of personal paintings to view including a Hussain, talk about art,plays and every other subject in this world along with some Jameson. Its good to have a popular artist as a friend/guide especially one who dabbles in everything creative. | |
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| Another friend condoled with me yesterday, and said the same thing I had posted about earlier..."At this age, we should expect and be resigned to such losses." This friend, too, is pushing sixty.
I realize that,first of all, these people imagine my brother to be sixty or over...surely they wouldn't say such a thing if they knew he was fifty?!
And in our culture (I am talking mainly of the Tambram community to which I , and both friends who made that observation, belong) we are conditioned to think of anyone over fifty as "old"....so perhaps, death is easier for them to accept.
I am 53, will be turning 54 in a couple of months...but as long as I am in good health and enjoying life so much, I don't feel "old" at all. I am very lucky that I am able to relate to people irrespective of their age or mine; I can have equally long and interesting conversations/ spend a lot of time with my 10-year old neighbour or my dad's friend who is 87....it's their personalities I interact with. It's a great gift, and I am grateful for it.
Age brings so many gifts, too. There is an acceptance of one's physical appearance, of one's capabilities and faults, which is NOT there at a younger age when one knows one can improve oneself in many ways. The majority of one's social and family obligations have been carried out. I have been able to get interested in a whole variety of new things, and the learning carries on. I have (I hope!) become more tolerant of people, and am trying constantly shed the judgmental (alas, typically Tambram!) I-am-morally-superior-to-everyone attitude that I find difficult to accept in others. I am still not able to control my temper or my emotions, but I am a little better than I used to be. The journey to conquering myself will continue, but I am able to look back and see that I *have* made some progress (I sound so superior and prissy myself now!)
But...I am not ready to retire into a corner and get my dentures fitted and wither away slowly. I have just as much zest for life today as I had when I was 20, and probably am enjoying it more, having come to terms with more than I had back then.
And I want my near and dear ones, *whatever* their age, to be healthy and happy too. No, I will NOT expect and be resigned to "losses". If they happen, I will have to deal with that; b Death may come to me and be dealt with, but I won't go in advance to Death and deal with it!
PS. these are only my opinions and thoughts; I don't expect others to always agree. - Tags:age, death, thoughts
- Mood:content
 - Music:uma subramaniam on arangisai..excellent...
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| marvelous things in the time it took me to take these pictures, one latched onto me    | |
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| It was bright sunshine in the afternoon, but as I walked down to the department store with my friend, the first couple of clouds moved across the sun:  The massive thunderheads began forming, but they still had their golden lining from the solar light:  Then, behind the water-bearing clouds, the ice-formations started showing, breaking the sunlight into prismatic rainbow colours.  Later on in the evening, it rained heavily..the steady pour of the monsoon rain...clouds are so very beautiful. I don't have to say to whom this post is dedicated....A-------e! Bengali literature is full of descriptions of the beauty of the monsoons.... | |
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| A story that confirmed what I knew must be true.... ![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) lizziebelle says: "There's a nifty article about crows on the NY Times site. It seems that they're able to recognize individual humans! Crows and their relatives — among them ravens, magpies and jays — are renowned for their intelligence and for their ability to flourish in human-dominated landscapes. That ability may have to do with cross-species social skills. In the Seattle area, where rapid suburban growth has attracted a thriving crow population, researchers have found that the birds can recognize individual human faces. " | |
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| I traveled on a hidden road today. I remembered the names of boneset and snakeroot, both in bloom right now, and knew them one from the other, and maybe because of that I found this other road, and wandered quite away from everything. A line from some nonexistent song came into my head: forgive me if you called and I didn’t answer: my ears were full of falling, and I hadn’t reached the bottomBut I did reach the bottom, I think: it was lined with sunlight, which streamed past the railroad ties and pooled where water was standing, where there are cattails and joe pyeweed. The air was thick with time moving at different speeds; at the borders of each current there were eddies and curls, like smoke, or like the wild cucumber tendrils. The air was thick, but very clear. For a moment I could see at different speeds. It made me feel like crying, but most intense experiences do. Here's a more mundane way of saying it ( another version )That's how life is, the warp is mundane, the weft is magical. Wouldn't it be cool if there were a program that would let you type mirror writing? | |
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| No, that doesn't mean 50 medals, it means India's position in the medal tally in the Olympics is 50! I just read Prem's entry about this.... That reminds me of one more anecdote about my brother. The unfailingly happy boy brought home a very bad report card. One being asked why he had such low marks, he said, "But see here! I have a very high rank!" (He was 25th out of 27 children!) It was late in the evening on Sunday, and in the twilight I saw this little sunbird trying to eat a fruit as large as itself, whole! The image is grainy and bad, but the greedy little bird made me laugh outright, so....  Food...no one is proof against gluttony. | |
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| I am already in love with my government class! I started reading my text book yesterday and had a light bulb go off in my head! I used to think socialism was the same thing as Communism, which is not an uncommon way of thinking for Americans, but with the help of good friends like travelertrish and lots of reading I have learned that you can have a socialized system, like medicine, and have a constitutional democracy as well. They way the text book explained it (in a very abbreviated form) is that Europe was controlled by the nobility that held nearly all of the wealth and nearly all of the power. We wanted to control our own money and also wanted our own power....which we won. However when France gained their independence they gained control of their government and saw an opportunity to distribute the wealth of the nobility between the populace, which is why France has such a great social healthcare system and it's not a Communist country. We, on the other hand, and with a different state of mind, in general, do NOT trust the government to be in charge of too large of a chunk of money....or anything for that matter. "We the people", want to feel like WE are in charge and we are....for the most part. I loved England. It's a beautiful place and the people, in general, are lovely. But the "Queen's this" and the "Queen's that" really started bugging me. I kept thinking, "Does everything over here belong to the Queen?" Well, no, of course it doesn't, but there was that "We the People" very American part of my brain that just bristled when I saw, "The Queens Mail". We have the U.S. Mail, and the "U.S. this" and the "U.S that" and every friggin politician knows he/she better make us feel like "We the People" are part of the process, any process, or it does not bode well. "The United States of America" is the same as saying "The United Peoples of America" and we make sure our voices are heard. We do not, and will probably never have, socialized medicine (if we did thousands of people would be out of work....one insurance policy = ten jobs) but we are trying to move in the direction where all people can receive health care. We have a lot of work to do but "We the People" can do it. I am going to love this class. | |
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| Now-a-days so much is happening in our office that I am tempted to blog. So here I go..
Let me start my entry into blogging world with the description of the game which all office gals are playing
This game is called secret angel. Our new admin Rachel started this new game. She called all gals, in our group (around 20 of us) to a room one day. We had to pick one chit which had a name written in it. From that day I am the secret angel for the gal whose name was printed in that chit. Similarly somebody else will be mine.
That day we also decided that we will give small gifts secretly to our respective secret angel every day and this would continue till aug 28th. On aug 28th , we will reveal our names.
From that day we gals are having heaps of fun. Looking at gal, guys are all J.. ;)
I have kept chocolates and have created a separate mail id for my secret angel. Through the secret mail id I send E cards.
My secret angel has also been making me feel special every day. Daily she leaves notes with sweet words and chocolates. Today she left a gift on my desk..
I am loving this game but alas it's gonna end - Mood:bouncy
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| Some trivial, some deep
The best is difference
Else wound, judge, resent
I desire it not.
No block of stone
Nor lead, nor weary weight.
Just an unremarkable, silent straw.
Some joys will not die
But let it lie; make it a last.
No more, no more. | |
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| Can someone recommend a
1 A good ayurvedic doctor - someone you have consulted and think highly of?
2) A good pediatrician
Preferably in & around Banerghata Road (BTM Layout, JP Nagar, Jaya Nagar) etc -
Thanks
Arun | |
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| I keep trying to tell myself that good habits are easy to form as bad ones. But that just isn't true, dammit. | |
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| I may ocassionally take quizzes without posting results. But I secretly want some of my blog readers to take this quiz & post their results. ( What kind of smart are you? ) | |
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| I was travelling by bus and I was idly contemplating the way women dress....here are two images.  That was the decoration on the over-everything-else black garment that a Muslim woman was wearing, isn't it beautiful? And this is another woman's foot:  I loved the toe-ring, the anklet, the bright salwar, and the design on the sandal... At a wedding recently, I was looking around at all the sarees and the jewellery that the women wore, and was enjoying myself immensely. But I am not a jewellery/saree person myself...the last time I bought/designed any jewellery was when my daughter got married, and have never felt the urge to buy a saree or a piece of jewellery since then. But I enjoy looking! I think often of Asha Bhonsle's words during an interview. When asked her opinion about remixes, she said, "Buddhi kO jitnA bhee zevar pehnAO, buddhi to buddi hee hai!" (No matter how much jewellery you put on an old woman, a hag is a hag!" When women are young..their youth is a beauty in itself, and probably they don't need jewellery at all; when they are old, no amount of jewellery will help in bringing back the radiance of youth! ....so why does jewellery sell so extremely well?! | |
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| One of the people who stands very high on my "EXPHO" (Excellent Photographers) list is yathin. I am sure he will be horrified at this compliment. But of the many people I know, he takes such excellent images, and his love of the subject just sings from every frame. Here are some photographs he has just posted: http://yathin.livejournal.com/254818.htmlI can't compare the photographs. I just look, and enjoy each one. No matter if I have the bestest camera in the whole world...I could never, ever, produce images like these. A couple of them brought involuntary tears to my eyes. They were not tears of joy or sorrow...it's an interesting concept I have learnt in my life, that there can be tears of beauty. I have shed tears of beauty when I finally saw the Pieta by Michaelangelo. I shed them when I was in the small public terrace in Trump Tower in Manhattan, looked up at the sun right overhead, and saw two perfect concentric rainbows, which I have never seen before or after. I have shed them when I seen the Himalayas, no matter how many times. Thank you for those images, Yathin. - Tags:photography, yathin
- Mood:where is my mobile????
- Music:where is my mobile???????????????
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| It's a kind of roller-coaster ride, this thing called bereavement. I never usually think that things like birthdays (after the first ten are over) are big deals, but I felt really low today, because today my brother would have turned 51. I remembered the lovely party my sis in law organized for him last year...KM and I went...did we even imagine that that would be his last birthday? Definitely not. One nice anecdote out of the past: My parents had bought us both expensive badminton rackets, and during a quarrel, my brother broke mine. Weeping, I went to my mother to complain. My brother followed almost immediately, with a happy smile on his face. "Sorry, I know I shouldn't have broken your racket!" he said; "I felt very bad, so I have broken mine also, I hope you will be OK now!" My mother was most certainly not OK! And the commentlessness...I keep my blog post public and even enable anonymous posting because I am interested in dialogue....today, my stat counter informs me that I had 111 unique visitors..did not even ONE of them feel like making a single comment? Expressing their point of view, plus or minus? Oh well. Friends came by, and cheered me up again....and let me post, from my trip to Nandi Hills, this image, that I call "Stairway to Heaven" (isn't that a beautiful song by Eric Clapton?)  With all the crowds and cars and trash, Nandi Hills is still an incredibly beautiful place.... | |
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| I'm not really in touch with any friend from my yesteryears nor is anyone in touch with me. Sure, we send text messages on each other's birthdays, and leave scraps on Orkut/Facebook, but we never get around picking up the phone and calling each other. - AC delivered her first baby earlier this month, and I did not even know about it until today. How I got to know about it? Her Facebook status message. It was a surprise because not too long ago we were the first to know about the big events in each other's lives; and small events too. We spent memorable times together; just us in an alien city of the Bongs, soaking in anticipation of what life had to offer.
- DV-B popped up on my Facebook after some 16 years of not being in touch. We squealed online, exchanged numbers with much excitement, and...that's it. None of us has called the other since then. I found her sister RV too - on Facebook. Same story.
- SR-S and I - best friends of several years; haven't met in 13 years. Both married now. Spent one week in the same city, made plans of meeting up, decided to ramble on like the days of yore. We didn't meet. Why? I can talk for myself - I felt too lazy to meet her, so I made excuse of not meeting. I'd rather curl up on my bed and read a book. Well, we do call each other sometimes. So yay!
- RG-H and I, not best of friends, still part of the same group. She didn't send me her wedding invitation. I didn't send her mine. But that's okay. Each of us knows that the other exists (via SR-S), but we don't really bother catching up by ourselves.
Rest of them, I don't even know (or care) where they are.
I remember myself as the girl who always, ALWAYS, wrote to her friends, called them every week, enquired after them. For a while, it was two-way traffic, and then one lane caved in. And then, I lost interest too. I have now come to a state where I don't really care what's happening in the other person's life, even if the person was once my best friend. Nor do I run to them breaking any kind of big news. We're just comfortable knowing the other person still exists, and is happy. Beyond that, we (at least I) don't feel any need for any kind of communication. I don't message them when I see them online. They occassionally message me.
There's a pattern. And the fault perhaps lies with me. I get bored of everything/everyone and too soon...and perhaps these people couldn't hold my interest that long.
Mera kya hoga?!! I'll die old and lonely :-( | |
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| Among the 100 to-do things left behind, I picked up calling my credit card customer care as my card was not activated after a replacement. It was quick and there was no confusion, before she let me hang up, she forwarded my call to the feedback center. I usually hung up, but today, I just stayed on the line and it took me less than a minute to dial feedback on her support.
I am unusually feeling happy for her, bcos I am sure, it would have made a difference to her day today, |
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